Back in November I wrote a post titled Relationship A and shared some insight on the relationship I have with my mother in law.
In the post I concluded that I needed to take a step back and allow my husband, her son, to take a hold of the reins.
Since then our relationship has been less strained, maybe a little more open but definitely less complicated.
In her latest book, Ellie Slott Fisher addresses the dynamic of Mom and daughter in law along with the dynamic of other relationships, such as sons, sisters, wives, girlfriends, husbands, and brothers.
It's Either Her Or Me:
A guide to help a Mom and Her Daughter-in-Law Get Along
I read this book mainly from a perspective of a daughter in law but since I have two sons of my own...the chapters on being a mother to boys also caught my attention. Before I knew it I was imagining the future and them asking me where their girlfriends should sleep during "sleep overs" should they bring their girlfriends home for the weekend. I was reeling. I can't even imagine it happening.
At the end of each chapter there are keepsakes to state the key points of the chapter. I found myself reading them more then once and really thinking about them.
Here are a few that really stuck with me
- A Mother in law may be difficult to love, but in some way, no matter how small, the man you love reflects her.
- A mother wants someone who will make her son happy. A girlfriend/wife just wants her to recognize that she does.
- Sons and boyfriends should never avoid the melee, especially since they're at the center of it.
- If necessary, a man has to consider the concerns of both women, and act as a mediator.
- Grandparents do not assume the role of parent-unless expressly asked to do so by their son and his wife
- A woman you view as a difficult mother in law may very well be viewed by your children as a
loving Grandma. And that is something for which to be truly grateful.
Don't think this book is for just the mom or the girlfriends/wives...There's a whole chapter about the son/husband and what his role in all of this is. He needs to be involved and he needs to have open communication with both women.
So, it's okay to tell him to get his head out of the sand. (Ahem, be nice)
Based on research and interviews Ellie covers a range of relationships and this book is definitely not just a guide on how to survive a relationship you may feel is doomed. There's some great tips in there and a different perspective which is a wonderful thing to gain when you're feeling you're at your wits end.
This book offers practical situations that you can apply to any relationship and Ellie does it all with a sense of humor. It was an enjoyable read, a valuable tool and I'll probably be pulling it back down from the bookcase over the next 18 years.
Are you in a strained relationship?
Do you and your in-laws get along?
Are you a man who needs to regain control over the two most important women in your life? (lol)
You should get yourself a copy of this book.
Lucky lucky you!! I have a copy to give away for free.
Mandatory Entry - that means you MUST answer this question in a comment in order to be entered.
If you won this book would you keep it for yourself or give it away? Why?
Extra entries can be achieved by doing any or all of the following:
Be or become a follower of Kerri's Klutter (If you already follow just say "already follow". New followers say "I now follow".)
Subscribe to Ellie's blog (Leave a comment so I can verify)
Become a fan of Ellie on Facebook (Leave a comment so I can verify)
If you're not the lucky winner copies of the book can be purchased on Amazon.com for the sale price of $11.25.
Ellie has also written: Mom, There's A Man In the Kitchen And He's Wearing Your Robe: The Single Mother's Guide to Dating Well without Parenting Poorly
Dating for Dads: The Single Father's Guide to Dating Well without Parenting Poorly.
Giveaway will end on Sunday April 18th at 8:00 pm EST and the winner will be randomly chosen and announced on Monday April 19th
Disclaimer: I received this book free to review from Random House through Business 2 Blogger. The winner of the giveaway will be mailed their copy directly from Random House. No monetary compensation received.