Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I Run But I'm Not A Runner

Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.
                      -Mohandas Gandhi

I am short.
When I was in junior high I was over weight.
I was on the basketball team but apparently I wasn't very good.

I don't know why.  

Did I mention I was short and over weight?

I never liked to run. I dreaded gym class on warm days when I knew the teacher would make us go outside.  That meant jogging around the school grounds, that meant I would be out of breath and sweaty and LAST.  By the time I was in 9th grade there were a few of us.  We'd walk.  The teacher eventually stopped trying to make us, "lost causes" run.

After school running became obsolete unless I had to scurry across a cross walk or J walk across a busy intersection.
Or when it was raining.  I run pretty fast when it's raining.  
I amaze many with my quick dash --ya know--from the van to the entrance of Walmart.

Skill baby, skill. 
Barely a drop gets on me!

But what now?  What can I say about running now?

Last year I started running.  I wasn't running to run though.  I had an ulterior motive.
You see, I was running to get myself out of bed and out the door by myself.  No kids in tow, no lugging a diaper bag, no twenty return trips into the house...I was out the door, with the tunes cranking and I was by MYSELF.  

It was this little slice of bliss every morning that I couldn't wait to sink my fork into.
I mean seriously, by the end of the first month I C R A V E D it.

It wasn't running that gave me peace of mind
it was the quiet of the morning.  

It wasn't running that made me feel good
it was that I was doing something for myself.  

It wasn't running that made me sign up for a 5k and complete it
it was self efficacy. 

I've run a few times so far this spring each time faster and longer then the last.

If you ask me "Do you like to run?"  I'd still say no.  I'm not a runner. 

If you ask me

"Do you like a brief moment of clarity?  Do you like quiet mornings?
Do you like to watch the sun rise in all its beautiful glory and feel its warmth on your face before so many others get to enjoy it?
Do you like doing something for yourself?
Do you like to accomplish goals you thought would never be your goals to accomplish?"


I run but am I a runner?  
I hate to run.

Unless it's raining.


Jb said...

I love mornings too...that's why I don't wanna ruin it with running ;)
It took me probably 35 years to accept the fact that I HATE running. So, now I just look for ways to justify not I found a book that claimed my body type was not right for running...needless to say, I quote that all the time ;)

Angie said...

I always wonder why in the world these people are outside running at some ungodly hour!

Now I know why!

Kristen said...

I watch you stalkingly, well, maybe...nah, just looking out for ya! When you get back I breath a sigh of "Phew, she made it back!" haha...missed you this morning though, hmmm...did you make it back?!?!?! EEEEK!! Now I have to peek in your windows!! ;)

Word verification:losismst
I losismst my sis...ha

Di said...

I hate running. I won't do it unless someone is chasing me or the dog is dragging me down the road. Unless I've had a stressful day at work. Then I throw my running shoes on as soon as I walk through the door..

Steph said...

Ooh! Great perspective!!

I hate to run too. After this baby is born, I might have to try your perspective. :)

Happy Wednesday!

My Mercurial Nature said...

I must say, I love running and do consider myself a runner, because it's what I do (and the only form of physical exercise I really enjoy). Running first thing in the morning, though? That one is TOUGH for me!

erica said...

lmao.. we have something else in common. i was one of those lost causes.. i always walked the mile.. well, i'd try to run, just couldn't do it, so i'd walk.. i could sprint like nobody's business though.. had to be quick when you had an older brother chasing after you.. (i could always outrun him too, haha.. that's what you get for smoking.. lmao)

MommyLovesStilettos said...

I really want to love to run, but I'm just not there yet.

Thanks for sharing! :)

Shell said...

What an awesome way to look at it! When you put it that way, I have a lot more motivation to want to get out and run, too!

Thanks for linking up!

PolishPrince said...

You nailed it with the title on this one. I see the positive effects it has on your mind & body. Not to be corny, but running really is more than j u s t running. To me it's an exercise for the mind & body.

the word verification is pretty funny: PREHONT

As it gets closer to Halloween, I always like to PREHONT around my!

Bossy Betty said...

You summed up why I love my morning walks and why when someone says "Can I come along?" I shrink back and shake my head!

Brittney said...

lol i hate running, but love being by myself! haha

Ian said...

Great post. I need to start running but that would mean I need to start jogging but that would mean I have to start walking but that would mean I have to get off the couch. I get off the couch to go to bed and the bathroom. See the problem here?

Beth said...

That's a great post, Kerri! :)

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

I am afraid I would get kidnapped if I ran alone.

My daughter and I want to run together because she hates it too and we think it will be fun to do together.

Although here is the thing. I took dance for 10 years and apparently i can not run without looking stupid. My parents and tyler LAUGH at me when I run with the girls. Like double over on the ground laugh at me, but they will not tell me how to do it right.


Anne said...

I wish that I would start running, or really get off my lazy ass and do anything at all. But alas I have always been unmotivated and oh so unathletic. Sad, but true. GOOD FOR YOU for taking that time for yourself! Great perspective.

Laurel said...

This made running appealing to me for the first time.

Of course, I don't think I'm in the shape to run--not at all. Maybe morning walks?

Kel said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kel said...

I did a similar post when i first started blogging. My father-in-law is an Ultra runner (100 milers), and he is always asking me to run a marathon with me. I've tried to train, but I can't push myself past 10 miles. I still run, but crazy distances. If you get a chance I just started a new blog about my writing journey.

Kim - In Search of Me in Mommy said...

I try to run. I want to love to run - or to find something I like about it, even the solitude of's hard. I love what you wrote. Thanks!

adrienne said...

I just can't seem to run, but I do very much like to go for walks and bike rides. :)

Good for you with the running!